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  • Relapse

    For people making and maintaining change in their alcohol and other drug use. Connect here to share your story and gain motivation today.
    Redone
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Thu Sep 19, 2019 10:46 pm

    Relapse

    Thu Sep 19, 2019 11:00 pm

    So I’ve been doing drugs xtc but manly meth and benzodiazepines for nearly 20 years .
    I can honestly say that I’ve never gone more than 5 months without some sort of drug, one or both of them together .
    I get to that point without drugs when I try stop and it’s like I’ve got ADD or something , I’m hyper , happy & mostly full of energy which I’m sure to most sounds like a win right .
    However for me that feeling doesn’t feel real , it’s feels fake like it’s not me and doesn’t belong to me it must be someone’s else. I feel like I’m over the top happy or something and people notice I’m acting all giddy .
    So I go back to doing drugs, to get that come down, to feel shit after a binge, because that, feels real for me
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    Vik
    Senior Member
    Posts: 206
    Joined: Mon Jan 21, 2019 12:54 pm

    Re: Relapse

    Tue Sep 24, 2019 3:48 pm

    Hi @Redone,
    Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing your story.

    It's interesting that you get the feeling that that joy is not yours - do you know why this is? Do you find that this levels out at all when it's been a while - sometimes going 5 months without using is quite a long time for some, do you feel like this feeling changes over time?
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    Charliez83
    Junior Member
    Posts: 7
    Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2019 12:25 pm

    Re: Relapse

    Thu Dec 19, 2019 8:50 pm

    I feel similar. the meth slows my crazy brain down as if i was an ADHD kid on dexy's......
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