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I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Fri Jan 25, 2019 4:53 pm
by Zena
Hi, I'm a new member and want to reach out for assistance. I want to stop drinking in the late afternoon.
My husband has terminal cancer and he can get anxious and this is a stressor for me. My drinking is not good for my health.

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2019 9:38 am
by Vik
Hi @Zena and welcome to the community! Thank you for your post, and for sharing your experience.
Im Vik, the community manager here.

The forums just started this week, there will be more community members soon to share support with you, so keep checking back!
I’m sure there are many who relate to your motivation and goals, that will have some ideas of strategies you can try to get past those urges in the afternoon.

I’m very sorry to hear about your husband, that much be really difficult for both of you.

I’m looking forward to reading about process to reaching your goal soon :)

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2019 2:21 am
by B4ME
Hi Zena,

Sad to hear about your husband.

I also want to stop drinking.
There are days when I wont have a drink, not often. However when I do I dont stop after one I keep drinking till I go to sleep.
I always seem to wake up around 2am or 3am and find it difficult to fall back asleep again so I start thinking about how I can be strong and not make that first drink the next afternoon. However I always seem to fall back into the bad habbit.

I tell myself everyday not to drink anymore, but then I do. :cry:

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2019 1:21 pm
by Jack23
Hi @Zena

I'm sorry to hear the news about your husband, it must a very stressful time for you.

Does your husband have support services to help him and yourself? It it important to have a break from assisting your husband.

Is there something new you could do to break the cycle you are in with evening drinks?

Are you currently seeing a counsellor to talk about the impact of your husband's illness on you?

I hope these suggestions help.

Take care and the best.

jack23

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2019 8:18 pm
by Vik
B4ME wrote:
Sun Feb 03, 2019 2:21 am
Hi Zena,

Sad to hear about your husband.

I also want to stop drinking.
There are days when I wont have a drink, not often. However when I do I dont stop after one I keep drinking till I go to sleep.
I always seem to wake up around 2am or 3am and find it difficult to fall back asleep again so I start thinking about how I can be strong and not make that first drink the next afternoon. However I always seem to fall back into the bad habbit.

I tell myself everyday not to drink anymore, but then I do. :cry:

Welcome to the community @B4ME, and thank you for sharing, that shows a lot of strength! I'm wondering if you could share with us some of the strategies you use on the afternoons where you're not drinking?
Sharing strategies that help with the community could be really helpful for others but also yourself :)

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Thu Feb 07, 2019 10:05 am
by Vik
Hi @Zena how are things going for you this week?

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2019 1:21 pm
by Digby
Hi . I am new to this community. I am addicted to wine in the afternoons drinking until I go to bed. I have made the decision to change or I will lose my family . Today is the first day and I am petrified of failing but excited that I might be able to change .

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2019 6:24 pm
by Jack23
hi @Digby

Welcome to forum and well done is seeking help. It takes courage and strength to put your hand up and share your story and seek help.

I wish you all best.

Take Care
Jack23

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 5:29 pm
by SJF77
Hi everyone,

B4ME,
I am in exactly the same boat. I am behaving in exactly the same way! I Have the best intentions every morning and yet I fail by the evening. I have tried contacting you directly but the link isn't working. I have added you to my friend list if you wanted to get in touch.

Zena,
How are you travelling? I can't imagine trying to cope with what you are dealing with at the moment. My mum also had to go through this with my dad, whilst I was going through a divorce so we both started our drinking around that time unfortunately.

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Tue Mar 26, 2019 8:44 am
by Vik
Hi @SJF77 welcome to the community! Well done on coming here and reaching out.

I'm so glad you've come here to connect with others. I just wanted to let you know that directly contacting other members is actually not available through this site. There are a number of reasons for this, the main one being that I'm sure there are many many others who would really benefit from hearing your experience and support. Don't forget that this is completely anonymous so you can feel safe to be open and sharing, you never know who you may be helping :)
I'm sorry that there was a button that made it seem possible! Are you maybe able to let me know which one that was so I can see if it should be removed?

Looking forward to hearing more about how things are going for you.

Vik, Community mgr

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2019 1:04 pm
by JonoP
Hi Zena
I have lost family to cancer too and I know how hard it must be for you. I can relate to the stressors that lead us to drink and I too don't want to drink anymore. I am new to the website and ready to give it everything I have. I am tired of poisoning myself with alcohol every night and I know we're all here for that same reason. I'm hoping that having that in common will help us to beat the addiction. I think the website has some great avenues to assess where we are, understanding our values and setting some goals to succeed. I already feel I am in a supportive environment but recognise it is up to me to make the change I want and need. I haven't started a counselling session yet but that will be my next step.
My heart goes out to you ans the pain you must be feeling, I hope you find here what you are looking for.
Jono

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2019 2:34 pm
by sol
Hi all, I'm new here too. Not sure if this is my thing or not, but we'll see! I just had a wow moment - I've just read a couple of posts that echo exactly where I'm at. Good intentions every morning, drinking again every evening. I smoke pot too, but these days it's 1 or 2 joints in the evening and I don't find it's affecting my life like it used to. That started due to depression/anxiety issues and insomnia. I never was a drinker until 4 or 5 years ago - when I met my husband. He loves a beer (or 6) and that's his business, but I'm proving again and again that I can't not join him. Not his fault, I love being out of it and have had addiction issues my whole adult life. I want to be the person who can make decisions for me and accept my husband for who he is, without asking him to change. So far, still failing at that. I'm accepting him but failing myself and becoming more and more alcoholic. When I try to stop I may succeed for a short time, then when I fail again I resent him for his influence. And round and round it goes...

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Thu Apr 04, 2019 11:05 am
by Koala_85
Hi Sol,

Its Koala_85 here (one of the moderators on the forum). Thanks for sharing your story and welcome! It sounds as though you're in a frustrating position at the moment in wanting to reduce and stop your drinking. However, with the right supports including communicating on this forum, will assist in your recovery. Like you said, its about making decisions for YOU. Welcome again and look forward to your future posts.

Koala_85.

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Wed May 01, 2019 3:43 pm
by T.
Hi peeps, today is my first day at reaching out.
I've always been a big drinker. It really got out of hand when I had to bury my 14 year old son to suicide.
I lost my drivers license, my job and my life was just going down the drain and I didn't care and hated the everyone and everything.
I met my now husband and he gave me something to live for again. I never showed him my drinking problem and had it under control, for a little while.
Then my drinking started getting worse and worse again. The fights and hatred came. Long nights of extreme vomiting for hours on end. I was just pushing my man away like I do with everything and everyone.
I got my drinking under control and we now have 2 beautiful young children.
BUT...
The drinking is back and it's getting so bad I'm going to lose my family if I continue down this path.
I lie about drinking, I sneak drinks, I hide drinks, I drink as fast as I can before it gets taken off me, I drink alone and at least once a month I'm now violently vomiting for hours on end.
This has to end now or I'm going to be dead and my children will grow up without a mother.
In the past I have found exercise to be very helpful. It gives me motivation, less depression and an overall feeling of wanting to be healthy.
I want to exercise but my body needs rest and healing.
Today is day #1 because I was vomiting for about 4 hours last night.
Tomorrow will be harder and the next.
I found this site today as I was searching for online help and I'm praying you guys help me beat this, as I hope I can help you too.
Sorry about the novel.
#desperate

Re: I'm wanting to stop drinking

Posted: Wed May 08, 2019 9:37 am
by Devondale
Hi,
I also want to stop drinking like I do. Every morning I wake up and tell myself not to do it and then on the way home I stop at a bottle shop then go home and secret drink.
I lie to my wife about drinking all of the time.
I can go times without it and I feel great but then I slip back into the habit again.
I have recently been diagnosed with PTSD. So I really need to get a handle on my drinking.
I just feel so good when I don't do it, I don't know why I do.