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  • Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    A place for community rundowns, special events and announcements from Counselling Online forums facilitation team.
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 280
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 11, 2021 8:26 pm

    Hello and I hope your Thursday has been a good one……….I’m really looking forward to the weekend!! It’s not gonna be great weather here in Melbourne but I’ll have my daughter with me so that’s always a bonus.

    I think it’ll be some indoor activities so it’ll be bowling one day and maybe even the movies the next. It’s been some time since we’ve been able to do this stuff so there is a bit of adjustment to go through as well. I know I’ve been walking around outside without a mask and feeling like I’m doing something wrong. I’ve found interactions with others interesting too. I was at the shops on the weekend and found myself being really self conscious about how close I was standing to others………..but I also found that some people were being really protective of their space too and although there was a feeling of freedom around it was tinged with some trepidation and fear at times.

    I really struggled towards the end of lockdown and found thoughts of using much more prominent that usual………..and it was all about escaping boredom. Even after six years I still have thoughts at times………it goes with the fact that I’m an alcoholic and an addict…………but usually they’re easily dismissed. This last lockdown was just different. Somehow I felt like I’d lost contact with people and in some ways was losing contact with myself. I wonder if anyone else can relate to that thought???

    I’d just lost the structure and routine I’ve worked so hard to get into place over the years. Now that I can start getting back to that it is bringing with it new fears…………or are they old fears that I thought I’d buried resurfacing?? I put on this brave face all the time and try to send a message of positivity through here all the time but the truth is that sometimes I struggle as well.

    So I feel like I’m emerging from the cocoon a bit and it brings with it some excitement too. I’ve heard it shared that fear and excitement are essentially the same emotion……….it just depends on your perspective of the situation. They both bring distinct nerves for me, I know that much.

    So yeah, we’ll start simple this weekend with the bowling and the movies……….maybe actually eat some dinner out on Saturday night. As it’s raining I’ll encourage that we put away screens and devices and try to do some painting or other craft type things. I’ll see what my daughter thinks because she’s the ideas person when it comes to that’s. But then again it may not rain all day like it seems to be predicted. I’ve made that mistake too many times of late. Thinking it’s going to rain all day but it doesn’t and then feeling like I wasted a great opportunity at the end of the weekend.

    So maybe I’ll just try and remember to take each day as it comes………..and keep it simple.

    What’s your plan???
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    Lhiver
    Community Builder
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue May 04, 2021 9:59 am

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 11, 2021 8:46 pm

    hey @PnorkelPW I totally agree with you about the end of lock-down dredging up a lot of emotions. It is a very strange feeling being out after the past two years, and I imagine a lot of people will understand where you're coming from with how the end of lock down has triggered cravings

    @WildeReformed @coda @Bunnycode @Tryingeveryday @awiepoc @JoelD @KathleenRose80 @PhoenixBlack @Chig @Comingclean
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    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 280
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 18, 2021 8:27 pm

    Another Thursday...............what's on for your weekend?

    I'm just sitting here reflecting on how much pressure plays a role in my urges. I say pressure but I feel like maybe lately it's been stress............is there a difference?

    I'm a perfectionist with OCD tendencies so most of the time the pressure I feel is a result of my own doing. My own thoughts. My own expectations of self. This might sound weird but I use my perfectionism to procrastinate at times and at other times my procrastination is a result of my perfectionism. I have this expectation that I should be able to figure everything out and get it right first time. I know that's not the case deep down but my head tells me a different story and sometimes it can be hard to redirect.

    At the start of the week I was feeling extremely overwhelmed with a number of things in my life and the only way to work through them was to keep fronting up each day and doing the best I can. As I sit here now on Thursday night that pressure has subsided...........because I've pushed through and crossed things off the list. I've addressed some of the issues that were plaguing me and will continue to work through others. As the week has gone on I've started to breathe easier. The thoughts of wanting to use external solutions have subsided and I'll walk into the weekend feeling a whole lot better.

    I guess what I'm saying is that this has been a tough week and tough weeks will continue to happen. It's possible to work through them though to get to the point that the pressure isn't so great and you feel light and happy again.

    Time is a great healer...............how have you got through your week?
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    Lhiver
    Community Builder
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue May 04, 2021 9:59 am

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 18, 2021 8:56 pm

    @PnorkelPW your posts are always so insightful. what you're talking about regarding recognising and learning to manage internal and external stressors is so important and I imagine a lot of people on the forum would relate to what you've been feeling.

    @weary_heart_restless_soul @NewHope @Sweetstuff @Scubak @mylesduffy @Simply me @jarrodm how are you all travelling?
    1 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 280
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 25, 2021 8:37 pm

    Thanks @Lhiver .......today's is a bit reflective too. I just started writing and this is what flowed. I :lol: "hope" you like it
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    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 280
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 25, 2021 8:38 pm

    Thursday Check-in…………sometimes I wonder if anyone is reading. Then I remind myself that it doesn’t matter. Someone might read it and that’s all that matters. I’ll just hope someone does and that maybe they get something from the words on the page.

    Hope is an interesting thing…………you can’t touch it but you can see it. I see hope in other people and it’s part of what helped me turn my life from addiction to recovery. Seeing other people who had achieved what I wanted to achieve and started to live a life without drugs or alcohol. In addiction I lost hope but then I found it again. Hope is a state of mind. If you don’t believe in it or you stop looking for it, you’re unlikely to ever find it. If you can just keep believing in yourself or believing that you want a better life you can find hope.

    Blind faith and belief can be difficult to maintain and that’s what the addiction wants to take from you. It wants you to believe that you’re not capable of change and you’ll never be able to live life any differently. The fact is though………….everyone is capable of change. It comes down to the choices you make. One good decision cam give you hope and prove that you’re able to do things differently. Even if you don’t manage to maintain that change it’s a sign that you can do it. From there it’s a about learning how to maintain that change. You never know if just having one more try is going to work. If you keep hoping you’ll keep trying and if you keep trying you can eventually make lasting change.

    I can’t count how many people I’ve spoken with over the years who have suffered in addiction and all but given up hope. Some have given up completely and the sad news is that not everyone makes it through once they lose hope. But I’m here to tell you there is hope. You know how I know???? I know because of the countless people I’ve spoken to who have achieved change. I know because these people are still here to talk to even though they came close to giving up all hope. Life can seem hopeless at times but if you can just keep believing that change is eventually possible then there is a better life out there for you.

    You can find hope by sharing here on the forums, by just reading what’s on here, by talking to other people who are trying to turn their lives around. Hope exists in SMART Recovery meetings, at NA and AA meetings. Hope exists in your drug and alcohol counsellors office, on the end of the phone when talking to DirectLine or another counselling service. Hope exists if you can just keep believing in it even when things seem like they couldn’t get any worse. Hope exists when you wake up the next day saying “I’m never doing this again”.

    Today I hope I can stay in recovery. I hope others can find recovery. I hope others can find hope. I hope I can keep evolving, that the world is a better place for my daughter to grow up in, that friends and family are safe. I hope I can sell my car, I hope the possums don’t wake me up tonight, I hope it doesn’t rain tomorrow. I hope all sorts of things…………….I hope that one day I might be able to sing.

    Remember just because you can’t touch it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. There is hope for you. What are you hoping for???
    0 x
    Lhiver
    Community Builder
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue May 04, 2021 9:59 am

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Nov 25, 2021 9:26 pm

    how's everyone tracking as we get close to the weekend?

    @Betterme1 @treble @Lubly @Ralphie @Eli7 @vanillabunny @Bothango
    0 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 280
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Thursday Check-in - How to stay sober on the weekend

    Thu Dec 02, 2021 8:26 pm

    Happy Thursday all………..I can’t believe that we’re in December already and another year is almost over. It’s been a tough two years but we’re coming through the other side and we’ve done it by just getting through each day……………it’s just like trying to stop using……………you just gotta keep fronting up each day and eventually the hard part will be over.

    This year has had some very challenging moments with a dark period towards the end but it’s another year that will end very soon with a new one to follow. Days tick by and it can sometimes they feel like there’s no end in sight………but they do end. When you’re in the early days of detoxing it can feel like it will never end. It feels easier to give up and keep using rather than fight through it to get to the other side. But it will end. It will get easier. There will be tough times to come………….and if you take it a day at a time you can get through it.

    Why waste another year using when you really don’t want to? Why wait another day? Start talking to someone who can help you on the path to change, your GP, psych or counsellor. BY starting today or at least starting to prepare today you’re already ahead of where you were going to be. There’s never a “good” time to stop. There’s never a perfect time to stop. A reason to continue using can always be found and justifications will always ring through your head………..but that’s the easy way out and if you take it you’re in for another year of using. Of anger, guilt, shame, remorse and self pity.

    If you’re thinking about making a new Year’s resolution to stop using………….why not start now??? Or at least start planning now.

    @ScorpionPW and I are here to help. If you have any questions, comments or thoughts please tag us and let us know what’s on your mind
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