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  • Share an inspiring or motivating quote

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    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 192
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Jul 12, 2021 9:46 pm

    "Honesty is often very hard. The truth is often painful. But the freedom it can bring is worth the trying" - Fred Rogers

    Love this soooooooo much @Peace Dove !!
    I remember in rehab the term honesty was used a lot. By the end of it I was using the phrase “Brutal Honesty” because that’s what
    recovery took for me. I’d told myself lies for years. Told myself I was okay with my actions, where life was taking me, was happy in my career………….all the people pleasing behaviour.

    The truth is I hated myself for my actions. Hated my drinking, smoking, dug taking and gambling. I learnt in rehab that I had to face up to it all but most importantly I had to face up to myself………..and that was painful.

    It took brutal honesty. Challenging myself and letting other people challenge me. It’s easy to tell myself a story and justify everything, blame other people and situations. The truth of it all at the end of the day was that I made choices that landed me in the position I was in and I had to face up to the results of those choices. I had to take ownership for my decision making and actions.

    I knew it would be painful, that’s part of what kept me stuck in addiction……….I didn’t want to feel the pain. I just wanted something to take the pain away and help me pretend that it didn’t exist. I had to try something though and by the time I hit rehab I was willing to try anything other than what I’d been doing. I’m not going to lie………it hurt and it kept hurting for a while but what I found was the more it hurt the better I felt because it lessened the pain. The pain subsided because I was no longer holding on to it. I felt the pain, accepted the pain as part of the process and began to let it go………..that’s where I discovered freedom and hope.

    As I keep moving forwards these days I’ve learnt that the more honest I am the less baggage I carry around. I don’t have to worry about covering up my lies or half thruths, what I’ve said to this person and what I have to say to keep the lie going. I’ve established my identity finally because I’m true to myself no matter what the outcome. It’s just easier than living in fear all the time.

    I’m reminded of the saying “Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional”………..these days I choose to feel the pain that comes through honesty because I don’t want to live in suffering anymore.
    2 x
    Peace Dove
    Community Builder
    Posts: 247
    Joined: Mon May 03, 2021 9:22 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Sun Jul 25, 2021 11:58 am

    Hi everyone,

    Hope you're all faring well despite current lockdowns and what not. Having this in mind, thought it would be nice to talk about self-care and remind ourselves the importance of self-care, especially during these crazy times we're living in. Without further ado, here's this week's inspiring/motivating quote :) :

    “Sometimes self care is exercise and eating right. Sometimes it’s spending time with loved ones or taking a nap. And sometimes it’s watching an entire season of TV in one weekend while you lounge around in your pyjamas. Whatever soothes your soul.” Nanea Hoffman

    Being in lockdown number 5 in Victoria, some of my lockdown activities include dancing in the living room (I use head phones so I don't disturb the neighbours), many phone calls with friends and family from here and from my home country, lots of TV time (I'm running out of series, please send recommendations, LOL), heaps of tea all day and minimising my exposure to news to only once in the morning and once in the evening/night. 8-)

    What are your self-care activities? @PnorkelPW @ScorpionPW @Alvarosyd @Exfitspo @Simply me @WildeReformed @Newlife21 @Strugglingmethaddict @Globe @Annie2405 @Katiee
    1 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 192
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Jul 26, 2021 9:53 pm

    Nice one PeaceDove and kinda in line with stuff @WildeReformed shared in another post

    I love this because for me self care does come in all these forms..............the hard part for me is knowing it's okay to stop and do the pj day from time to time. I fall into the trap of needing to be busy and "achieving" all the time or that self care involves doing things rather than sitting and doing nothing sometimes.

    I needed this reminder today..........constantly learning to make adjustments and challenge my thinking
    3 x
    ScorpionPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 220
    Joined: Tue Apr 13, 2021 10:06 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Tue Jul 27, 2021 9:45 pm

    This quote really resonates with me @Peace Dove, thanks for sharing :)

    I've found it to be so true that self care looks so different week by week, day by day.

    Sometimes it's exercising, eating really healthy and relaxing at home to restore. Then sometimes it's enjoying a nice meal out with friends, being lazy and having a treat and just watching some netflix. The biggest thing that took me a long time to learn was to not be hard on myself for relaxing or straying from the regime/structure I have set for myself.

    I feel that the longer I'm in recovery the more I know what I need and when I need it. I also get better at stating my needs and doing what I need for my self care unapologetically.

    BTW a new series I absolutely loved was Sweet Tooth if you're into sci fi/fantasy type stuff :D
    1 x
    WildeReformed
    Junior Member
    Posts: 24
    Joined: Thu Jul 15, 2021 2:46 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Fri Jul 30, 2021 5:09 pm

    Thanks for sharing @Peace Dove I really feel for you Victorians. You've borne the brunt of these lockdowns.

    @PnorkelPW I really understand the feeling of needing to achieve. It can be difficult to slow down and do the mediative self-care which is also required.

    I resonate with this quote because self-care recently has been marketed as meditating and yoga, or hikes, healthy eating and bubble baths. I personally think that self-care is doing anything that prioritises yourself and your needs. If it's turning your phone off for a day because you feel like you need some time alone, or listening to your body when it wants pizza, even just reminding yourself of your commitment to sobriety... these are all little do-able and achievable acts.
    3 x
    Peace Dove
    Community Builder
    Posts: 247
    Joined: Mon May 03, 2021 9:22 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Sun Aug 01, 2021 2:53 pm

    "I am not responsible for my addiction but I am responsible for my recovery." - shared by @ScorpionPW
    1 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 192
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Aug 02, 2021 9:00 pm

    This is an awesome quote from @ScorpionPW

    I was talking to an old friend who contacted me yesterday…………he’s still in addiction. I’ve spoken to him once in over 6 years and he wants to reconnect. There’s still a lot of denial going on and I’m happy to support him………..but from a distance………I won’t let him back into my daily life because “I am responsible for my recovery”.

    I am responsible for making choices that allow me to maintain my recovery. I will not let anyone jeopardise what I’ve spent years building………….my life is in too good a place right now. I’ll share what has worked for me over the phone because sharing a message of hope is part of my recovery program…………but he has to do the work himself.
    2 x
    Peace Dove
    Community Builder
    Posts: 247
    Joined: Mon May 03, 2021 9:22 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Sun Aug 08, 2021 12:51 pm

    Hello beautiful community,

    It's time for one of my favourite weekend activities. So without further ado, here goes today's quote:

    “The priority of any addict is to anaesthetise the pain of living to ease the passage of day with some purchased relief.”– Russell Brand on drug abuse

    This is a very powerful message. For most people in addiction, the addiction is the top of the iceberg -or the symptom- of a more profound inner issue. Substance use is a short-term solution to numb those deeper thought/feelings that trouble us and take our peace away from us. You may be able to quit overnight, go cold turkey, pass withdrawal, etc, but a lapse or relapse is almost a guarantee down the road without addressing the more deeper voids we're trying to fill in or "relief" with substance use.

    Really want to hear what are your thoughts or experience on this @ScorpionPW, @PnorkelPW, @Angel.w, @EtherealAngel111, @Smith1412, @Rob123, @nancyrose, @Anon1, @Ds67, @JR78, @UltraViolet, @CatMumofone, @MRJames000, @Renae38, @Katiee, @Simply me, @bertalc1, @Girl_1479, @WildeReformed, @Strugglingmethaddict, @Bpk30

    Remember there's no right or wrong answer, everyone's experience is unique and everyone's take/opinion is valid.
    0 x
    ScorpionPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 220
    Joined: Tue Apr 13, 2021 10:06 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Aug 09, 2021 9:09 pm

    I love this quote @Peace Dove and I've always loved the way Russell Brand speaks about addiction.

    This one absolutely resonates with me. Growing up I was severely bullied and this traumatised me greatly. I often had thoughts of taking my own life and couldn't stand myself because the way my peers treated me affirmed all of my negative self beliefs. Then, I remember the first time I used with people who weren't treating me like everybody else was and it was like I felt comfortable in my own skin for the first time ever, I felt ok for the first time since very early childhood. My addiction was then just trying to recreate the way that first time felt and just trying to live in that state constantly.

    In a sense I feel like drugs saved my life because it stopped me from my mind going to really dark places, temporarily at least. Of course in the end, the drugs stopped working and no matter what I did I couldn't stop my thinking from going to that really dark place, it was like I had no buffer anymore. That was a really scary place to be because I didn't know what to do, my solution to the world and to coping with life had stopped working.

    All using ever was for me was self medicating to cope with life, I couldn't see that at the time but it's easy for me to see now that I have so many years of seperation from the last time I used to now.

    This is exactly why new connections and finding things that I could look forward to getting out of bed in the morning for was so, so important. I had to fill that void that the drugs had left or I couldn't have survived alone with my thinking the way it was.

    It was great to reflect on this and I'm keen to see how this resonates with others :)
    2 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 192
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Aug 09, 2021 9:56 pm

    “The priority of any addict is to anaesthetise the pain of living to ease the passage of day with some purchased relief.”– Russell Brand on drug abuse

    Love it @Peace Dove ………..I saw Russell Brand last year just before lockdown, he’s got great insight into addiction and recovery.

    The word relief stands out for me most there. That’s what I was after……..relief. In part it was to settle my uncomfortability, the fact that I never ever felt like I fitted in until I had a substance in my system and the fact that as those substances subsided I needed more to give me the relief until they just stopped working. That’s when I started to seek other substances and use them more often until I lived in a state where there was always something foreign pumping through my bloodstream.

    The thought of living without that pain relief was waaaaay too much to bare. The fear that would hit me like a truck when the prospect of living without it was merely mentioned drove me deeper each time. I did a lot of work over a number of years trying to turn things around and it all came together for me in rehab. That’s where I finally faced my pain. Stood up to it. Started to find true relief as I started to work through and understand it. Over time my pain subsided but I needed the safe space that rehab provided to give me a pathway to recovery. There was more pain to come but I’d already begun to understand that I didn’t need a substance to help me deal with the pain………..I was capable of dealing with it myself………and the support of others who I finally let in and help me.

    In active addiction my priority was to numb the pain every moment of every day……….in recovery I’ve learnt that pain is inevitable………..it’s the suffering that’s optional. Accepting the pain allows me to live my best life. I’m not saying it’s easy……….but it’s worth it.
    3 x
    Melody12
    Moderator
    Posts: 151
    Joined: Thu Jan 24, 2019 4:27 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Aug 09, 2021 11:36 pm

    Hi @PnorkelPW ,

    Sharing your personal experience is truly valuable to others.

    Thank you

    Melody12
    Moderator
    0 x
    WildeReformed
    Junior Member
    Posts: 24
    Joined: Thu Jul 15, 2021 2:46 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Thu Aug 12, 2021 5:28 pm

    @PnorkelPW I resonated with this so much
    In active addiction, my priority was to numb the pain every moment of every day……….in recovery I’ve learnt that pain is inevitable………..it’s the suffering that’s optional.
    I've been learning a lot through the forums and one realisation that I've had is that for the 5 years before my relapse I focused on NOT using. I wasn't addressing any of the underlying emotions around WHY I used. Instead, I just knew that using was sending me into a spiral and that I had reached the very bottom and needed to use all of my strength to walk away- and maybe at the time that's exactly what I needed but eventually the emotions caught up and I could no longer deny/avoid/ignore.

    A question which I have been asked in an exasperated tone from loved ones so many times before "why do you use?" has now turned into a powerful question which I have been asking myself "Why do *I* use?" and everytime the answer is 'to escape'. To escape myself, to escape my mind, to escape unpleasant emotions, uncomfortable situations, the past, present or future...

    and it's got me. I don't want to spend my life trying to escape it because running away from the emotions doesn't stop them from occuring, it doesn't stop any of the pain long-term, it's a temporary relief in exchange for a different type of pain... the pain of being a drug addict and all of the challenges that entails.

    I'd like to end this by saying it's simple but facing the underlying emotions isn't. It's unpleasant, uncomfortable, and at times overwhelming but I'm focusing on experiencing them, letting them rise, learning to understand them, and ultimately accept them. Who knows, it's one day at a time, but I'm hopeful that this relapse has taught me what truly needed my attention.
    3 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 192
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Thu Aug 12, 2021 10:10 pm

    Can’t tell you how much I love this share @WildeReformed ………..thank you for sharing.

    I spent years in resentment blaming circumstances, situations and other people for my problems. It was only when I started asking what can “I” do about it? that things changed. What is “my” part in “my” life? What decisions have “I” made that resulted in “me” ending up in the circumstances of “my” life?

    By taking ownership of my life and my decisions I began to understand what led me to make the choices that kept me trapped in a life of addictions……………by understanding what drove me to those choices I understood what could prevent me from going down that track again.

    Whenever I go through extended periods of thinking about using again I start to ask myself……….”What is it about the current state of my life that has looking for an escape? Why am I looking for an external solution to an internal problem?”

    By addressing these questions I’m able to start to find the solutions and as you say………they aren’t always easy, they can be uncomfortable and unpleasant at times. One of the many things I’ve learnt is that life isn’t a postcard of an island holiday……….there are moments where it’s like that but there are a whole lot of moments where it just plain sucks too. Substances kept me in an endless timewarp of denial. Escaping isn’t the solution and substances don’t solve the problems. The only thing they do is keep them at arm’s length. I tell the story that for me it was like I just kept sweeping my problems under the rug and looking forwards………….but one day I turned around and it was all right there behind me…………under the rug waiting to come crashing down. I had to experience that pain. I had to go through the tough times so that I could leave them behind and move on to the next experience. Through doing this I found true joy too because that was all I was feeling at the time………..it wasn’t tinged with the unresolved guilt, shame, remorse or any other negative emotions. In that moment it was pure joy.

    In early recovery I HATED the term a day at a time……….now I understand it. Now I understand that the sun will come up tomorrow. That pain does pass. That some days will be better than others and if I accept my current situation for what it is then…………I WILL BE OKAY.

    Relapses are definitely learning opportunities and by accepting the causes you can work the solutions.
    3 x
    Peace Dove
    Community Builder
    Posts: 247
    Joined: Mon May 03, 2021 9:22 am

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Sun Aug 22, 2021 2:25 pm

    Hi everyone,

    It's time for one of my favourite activities in the forums: 'Share an inspiring or motivating quote'. With current lockdowns and having recently come across with this famous phrase several times on the forums, I thought it would be worth remind ourselves about it and reflecting a little bit deeper on it (I'm sure many are already familiar with it):
    “One step at a time. One day at a time. One hour at a time.” - unknown
    Image

    What has this quote meant to you and looked like during your recovery journeys @PnorkelPW and @ScorpionPW? How does this look like in your everyday lives? @UltraViolet, @WildeReformed, @initae89, @BonsaiBeginner, @Jessjess, @Maggie21, @Anila88, @Sandy48, @adin4757, @apples123, @Misato, @Downward.Dingo, @CatMumofone, @Lex1190, @Eliza.C
    2 x
    BonsaiBeginner
    Junior Member
    Posts: 21
    Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2021 2:30 pm

    Re: Share an inspiring or motivating quote

    Mon Aug 23, 2021 3:23 pm

    Each day is a new opportunity. Today I am trying to see the positives. I didn't stay sober all weekend but I did do better than the last few weeks. I did walk the dog today and do my uni work but I didn't start the day with yoga and meditation.
    I usually start my mornings with plans and good intentions but the afternoon often means I have run out of motivation to continue the positive choices. Likewise I start the week planning not to drink on the weekend but unless I have something planned with non drinking friends I find it hard not to give in to temptation.
    I feel like I need reminders to stay on track!
    5 x

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