Welcome to our online peer support community. Connect with others making change in their alcohol and other drug use. Join our online community today.
  • Connect, be inspired, motivate others. Share your experience & strategies.
  • Safe. Anonymous. Professionally moderated. Free of judgement.

    Join us Mondays at 8pm - 10pm AEST for Monday Meetup.

    Your posts will automatically appear live on the forum.
  • Exhausted

    Alcohol is the most commonly used substance in Australia. Join this forum to discuss issues and find support relating to alcohol use and recovery.
    Calmer7
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Fri Feb 14, 2020 10:52 am

    Exhausted

    Thu Feb 20, 2020 9:24 am

    Hello,

    I am an alcoholic and very tired of my inability to just stop drinking. Years. Not to mention how much I spend every week. I find myself clean and loving being sober for a day or two, then once again I've got a bottle of wine hidden and I just drink the whole thing in a few hours, often more, can't sleep and screw the next morning completely, feeling hungover, tired and anxious.

    Does anyone who has succeeded in quitting drinking have ideas for how to distract my mind when the urge hits? There's a window of about 3-4 hrs that I need to pass through.

    I didn't like AA meetings.

    I dream of being sober for at least 6 months, because I just know how good I'll feel.

    Everything else in my life is pretty good, so I don't understand how I keep f@*!ing myself over every other day with this addiction.
    3 x
    Cat7
    Moderator
    Posts: 105
    Joined: Thu May 09, 2019 10:52 am

    Re: Exhausted

    Thu Feb 20, 2020 5:46 pm

    Welcome to the community [mention]Calmer7[/mention],

    Sounds like this is a great place for you - it’s really important to know that you’re not alone and I'm sure so many on here can relate to your experiences.

    Is there anything you’ve tried in the past at some stage that’s helped you through the urge? There's a few good suggestions in the thread "Activities to do instead of drinking" but like you I'm curious to hear more suggestions from others too.

    Looking forward to hearing more
    3 x
    Djarrimiri
    Junior Member
    Posts: 14
    Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2020 5:51 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Wed Apr 15, 2020 8:16 pm

    I am the same. Wish people had offered some ideas.

    In the past, I've replaced drinking with hiking and reading. During COVID19, few things are working. The only thing that saves me is to not order a delivery.
    I did my first order 2 weeks ago, and drank the lot - about a bottle of wine a day. Finished it off last night and was filthy tired and exasperated with myself today.

    I'm worried now ... I will ring TP when I get the urge to order and I've registered for the Ready 2 Change programme. I have an appointment with my GP tomorrow, will tell him what I'm doing. Friends are too ready to excuse the behaviour so I'm glad finally to have access support to stop.

    My GP helped me through my last bout in 2017, when I was suicidal due to work stress. He'll probably want to have regular check-ins and hopefully will be glad that I have already actioned getting help through TP. He gave me the number for Turning Point in 2017.
    2 x
    Renae38
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2020 6:48 am

    Re: Exhausted

    Wed Apr 29, 2020 8:27 am

    I agree
    1 x
    Simply me
    Member
    Posts: 69
    Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2019 8:51 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Sun Jul 12, 2020 7:57 pm

    Heylo Calmer7, Djarrimiri, Renae38, Folks...

    Felt to start by writing some things I do which may contain a seed, or not.
    I find calling /chat /writing via some form of open safe connection helps when cravings hit...

    Kettle's on, starting point. Herbal tea, 'Motherwort' (Leonuris cardiaca) she's my go to chill pill and has the loving yet protective vibe of a rocking Mum. I admit openly I'm on psych meds, this herb is as potent as some of them with no side effects I know of. You can find her at health food shops, I find dried as a tea best. 2 or 3 teaspoons in a pot n let it brew a whiles to get potent, 10 mins is good. Tastes bitter n takes getting used to but does the job of calming nervous system and heart racing agitation (in my experience). 2 cups n I should be in a bit of a better space. Check out supermarket shelves for herbs like Chamomile, or 'relaxation' mixes. Dandelion coffee, can be drunk with sweetener and milk like the caffeinated version, but great for liver recuperation. There's just something about a cuppa....

    I found having a list of activities I could turn to which 'nourish' to my tastes, whacked on the fridge, got me through. When your brains jammed with a craving, it can help to have a go to high, n lower level, energy 'to do list' to pick something from. It seems a spectrum, whether you have any to expend on distraction, or you're just ready to veg out, or in my case at times, call it a day and crash early. My hardest time of day is arvo / eveningk, so some nights yup in bed by 7.30 party on....

    Some higher energy distractions: Walks, even blockies (might scavenge something from a chuck out pile or engage with nature). Swims. If able to focus I like crafting n using my hands diy style: for me in the now this means hand sewing n botanical dyeing or drawing n doodling (not being concerned with outcome just do it). Cooking a nourishing meal n eating it, play guitar n sing (look out neighbours), read n research a tangent, tai chi, hobbies rock. Can you tell I'm not the gym type...cardio not going to happen. Oh yeah clean-domestics crank the stereo and kitchen dance...

    Some lower energy distractions: Curl up a whiles with my fella (if he's within cuddle reach) or / and cat (generally is), lay / collapse on grass somewhere with sunlight being bonus, water garden / plants, chat / call someone including Lifeline, CounsellingOnline.org, friend. Cuppa alone or shared, listen to music, light a candle, pull an oracle card, eat a strong mint (repeat copiously throughout day). Gaze inanely at a body of water or view, scents are good=essential oils, incense, smudge. Watch a dvd, generally kideos as violence triggers me, podcasts or audio talks. Homemade mantra's / prayers/ call outs for spirit allies to walk beside me....

    That's probably enough from me....
    Blessings n good vibes....
    2 x
    Bamboo [facilitator]
    Community Manager
    Posts: 223
    Joined: Mon Jun 15, 2020 7:46 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Mon Jul 13, 2020 8:07 pm

    Hi [mention]Simply me[/mention] thank you for sharing your go to distraction techniques when cravings hit :) I'm sure others will find this useful. Hope you are having a good night.
    1 x
    forest
    Junior Member
    Posts: 15
    Joined: Mon Sep 21, 2020 1:40 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Wed Oct 07, 2020 11:33 am

    Hi [mention]Simply me[/mention] ,

    These are some amazing tips, thanks so much for sharing!

    I think it's really great how you've recognised that some things appeal to you more than others, because it's important to actually enjoy your distraction activities (e.g. dancing around the kitchen over a gym workout - very relatable!).
    If you can think of any more, let us know.

    And just checking in with you [mention]Calmer7[/mention] , [mention]Djarrimiri[/mention], [mention]Renae38[/mention]. How are you going?
    Remember we're always here, whether it's to share some distraction tips of your own or just to vent.

    Take care

    - forest
    2 x
    wiltedflower
    Junior Member
    Posts: 12
    Joined: Mon Sep 21, 2020 1:18 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Thu Oct 22, 2020 12:06 pm

    Hi [mention]Simply me[/mention] ,

    Thank you so much for sharing these ideas! What a great list for all of us to refer to when we need it :)

    Does anyone else have their own ideas/ ways of distracting/ calming down? [mention]Calmer7[/mention] ? [mention]Djarrimiri[/mention] ? [mention]Renae38[/mention] ?
    1 x
    Djarrimiri
    Junior Member
    Posts: 14
    Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2020 5:51 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Wed Jan 05, 2022 6:51 pm

    @Simply me - that is an extensive list. it communicates commitment to staying sober. well done.

    I'll check out motherwort. Chamomile works for me, too. Coffee is not yummy for me but i do tend to overload on caffeine through soft drinks (Pepsi Max) ugh!. I've just bought a lot of Nexba, and hope that will sort/finish the caffeine.

    Too often one of my patterns is to drink after a poor sleep. I fear not sleeping and wine reliably knocks me out.

    I've had a tight chest off / on for the past few weeks. It's probably hay fever but I had a covid test anyway today. Iso for me!!
    Not a drop of wine in the house so fingers crossed for not ordering and for a negative covid test.
    1 x
    PnorkelPW
    Peer Worker
    Posts: 334
    Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2021 3:14 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Thu Jan 06, 2022 9:20 pm

    I'm gonna have to try the Motherwort too...........I usually do the peppermint/chamomile combination which works a treat

    What's nexba @Djarrimiri ???

    Sleep is my biggest downfall and after years of being so up and down with my sleep patterns I'm determined that this year I'm going to get them into shape and more importantly maintain them. Everything spirals out of shape when my sleep goes whacky. I stop getting up to exercise, beat myself up for it, get into negative headspace, my diet gets out of control and I get frustrated with life in general.

    Hopefully your test comes back negative...............did you manage not to order in last night??
    1 x
    Djarrimiri
    Junior Member
    Posts: 14
    Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2020 5:51 pm

    Re: Exhausted

    Fri Jan 07, 2022 4:01 pm

    Sleep is the key to happiness. I am most likely to binge drink if i haven't slept well, as I can rely on the alcohol to knock me out.

    I didn't order in. Too lazy. It's too much work. I rarely order takeaway or delivery either. I just did an order with Coles today for some keto snacks and it didn't even cross my mind to look at wine. I think I learned my lesson from last year's lockdown when I ordered a case of my low alcohol wine and drank it in 2 weeks. That was horrid. Talk about whacked out sleep!! It could be said I didn't really sleep for those 2 weeks. I rang my GP in tears and got hooked up with regular A&D counselling.

    My test came back negative but my apartment building has 'several' cases so I'm staying in tonight. I think a lot of us are self-isolating, especially since the PM seems to have thrown us all under the bus. :( so unnecessary. We almost had zero cases again in VIC.

    Moving to new neighbourhoods is difficult. Sending you support for that. Community work and team sport helps meet people. I finally got an email from Back2Bikes to start learning from and working with them. I've been keen since Oct/Nov. Good luck with sensible socialising
    1 x

    Return to “Alcohol”