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Re: What does recovery mean for you?

Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2021 9:19 pm
by ScorpionPW
No worries at all @Alvarosyd, it's great to see you checking in again :)

Congratulations on your 6 months, that's amazing! Huge achievement!

My god can I relate to what you're saying about discovering who your real friends are once you get into recovery!

Once I got clean I had my so called "friends" kept trying to convince me I could get away with just having one drink and couldn't accept or understand my decision to stay abstinent from everything. For a little while I was still hanging out with them but I figured out pretty quickly that if I kept spending time with them I would end up picking up again so I eventually made the decision to cut them out because I knew I couldn't let anything jeopardize my recovery.

Even though I knew I had to make that choice it was still a painful choice to make because I was losing the main connections I had, it was like having to start from scratch and it felt lonely. Because of this it was really important for me to create new connections that were recovery focused. For me, I did this through meeting people at 12 step meetings, going to second halves, getting coffee and just engaging with the recovery community. I was able to find like minded people who wouldn't try and drag me down and who supported my recovery because they were living the same way.

I'm wondering if you've tried anything to make any new connections or friends? Like gone to any peer groups or anything like that?

Re: What does recovery mean for you?

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2021 10:16 am
by Alvarosyd
@ScorpionPW I haven’t tried any support groups yet but I am thinking I will be going to one soon. I totally agree, it is hard to keep those so-called “friends” around . I hate that phrase: oh come out with us, you can have just one we will keep an eye on you. It is so detrimental in so many ways. I wouldn’t like to go out with them to have them “keeping an eye on me” clearly showing to everyone else that I cant control myself! I have also told them
You know I won’t stop at one drink . It will be a big night and I will feel awful the next day. I have a couple of friends who are on my side and really try to support me. But the majority of the other friends have just vanished! The feeling of loneliness is real and very unpleasant, but I believe I can do this!

Re: What does recovery mean for you?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2021 8:49 pm
by ScorpionPW
Yeah you're spot on @Alvarosyd, it is hard to have them around and once the realisation happens that you're just on a different trajectory to them it just doesn't make sense to spend time with them anymore. Well that's what it was like for me anyway, but as you said it can be lonely and it's important to find some new connections to help with that.

Let us know how you go with some support groups and we're always here if you want to know more about any of them or how to access them :)

Re: What does recovery mean for you?

Posted: Tue Dec 28, 2021 11:32 am
by Lhiver
@Alvarosyd I just wanted to drop in and see how you've been going?