What does recovery mean for you?

[ScorpionPW]

For a long time I was told that 'you're not in recovery unless you're completely abstinent'. It did end up being true for me that I was not able to achieve any significant changes or move towards a different way of living until I made the decision to stop trying to control my substance use and accepted that I needed to be completely abstinent. But this is not true for everybody!

I've met a number of people now who had a substance abuse problem but through getting the kind of help that allowed them to work through the underlying issues that led them to use substances the way they did, were able to develop a new, more healthy relationship with substance use.

I have also met people who believe that the idea of complete abstinence is just too big of a pill to swallow and is just too much of an overwhelming concept to consider, but who have managed to improve certain areas of their lives and health through practising harm minimisation.

The main point I'm getting at is that recovery is such an individual thing, it's as individual as our fingerprints. I heard somebody say in an AA meeting once 'What gets me sober might get you drunk and what gets me drunk might get you sober' and that's always stuck with me.

I have grown to believe that recovery is just meaningful life change which can take a lot of different forms and be defined in a lot of different ways.

It would be great to hear from people about what meaningful life change you are working towards and what recovery looks like for you?

[Lhiver]

Thank you so much for this @ScorpionPW recovery is such an individual thing, and no one can tell you how your recovery should look! I''d love to hear what recovery looks like for some of our members? @ritch , @Katiee , @pdm411 , and @Alvarosyd

[Alvarosyd]

To me recovery is being able to be in charge of my life and most importantly in charge of my mental health and know that alcohol won’t solve my issues !

It means a better relationship with my friends and partners, and happier days overall!

I’m looking forward to having this as my new normal!

[teapot]

Congratulations on the beginning of your new normal, @Alvarosyd , it sounds like you really value your relationships with your friends, your family and yourself and these changes will help you to live more in line with those values <3

[ScorpionPW]

I love how simple this is @Alvarosyd. The fact that you can visualise that getting in control of your life and improving your relationships as a new normal is fantastic.

It took me a long time of figuring out what won't work to figure out what will work in my recovery to be able to begin to turn what I visualised my life to look like without drugs into my reality.

I'm wondering where you're at in your journey now and what you're doing to work towards this 'new normal'?

[Katiee]

Recovery for me looks like having a clean period. Gaining part time employment. Also in the process of getting my children back. Maintaining stable housing.

[Alvarosyd]

@ScorpionPW lately I have been working slowly but surely on making sure that my partner and friends know that if I am having withdrawal symptoms that it is just temporary and that craving will go away. They have been very supportive. They put on a good TV show I like or show me something that will make me laugh. It’s been working great. Every morning I wake up and I go to pilates, and am grateful for all that I have surrounding me! Exercise has been a great friend!

[ScorpionPW]

That's great to hear that your partner and friends are so supportive @Alvarosyd and that you're not going through it alone

Ohh absolutely! Exercise is the best natural mood stabiliser and it's great that it's working for you.

Thank you for continuing to share your journey with us. I hope to continue to hear how you go with things.

All the best, stay safe over the weekend and remember we're always here if you want to reach out

[PnorkelPW]

What I love most about what you said in this @Alvarosyd is that you shared your struggle with your partner and friends so that they can help you when you're struggling. Too many people try to hide that stuff and it just makes life soooo hard. This is probably one of my top tips...........share the struggle. The more you fight it and keep it to yourself the stronger it gets. As soon as you share it, let other people help and let them sit with you while you surf the wave life gets easier.

People can only help if you let them........and they only know how by sharing with them

[Alvarosyd]

I agree
It is so good to be able to open up. My partner saw me very angry and craving a beer. I got an alcohol free beer when I got home! It was the thing I needed. And I am almost into my two months sober today!

[Melody12]

Two months sober today @@Alvarosyd, thats a good milestone and important to share.


Cheers,
Melody12

[ScorpionPW]

You absolute legend @Alvarosyd! Congrats on the milestone! I love seeing this stuff, thanks for sharing with us

And I love what you said @PnorkelPW, it's so true. One thing that I heard that has always stuck with me, continuously encouraged me to reach out and has served me well is "a problem shared is a problem halved".

[PnorkelPW]

Keep up the good work @Alvarosyd ...........I love that you're finding the solutions that work for you........just keep doing what you're doing

Some days will be better than others but every day is a good day if you don't pick up!!

[ScorpionPW]

Just thought I'd check in @Alvarosyd and see how you're travelling? If things are still going well or if you need support with anything? Would be great to hear how you're going on your journey and hope you're well

[Alvarosyd]

Hi @ScorpionPW thanks for checking in and my apologies for being absent. Work has been crazy.
I can happily report i have been sober for 6 months! I’m starting to notice that some friends are starting to distance themselves away from me as I am not interested in going out and getting legless with them anymore. I have shifted my priorities towards building a healthy household for myself, my partner and my 2 dogs. I won’t lie and say it has been easy seeing “friends” slow disappear, but it has definitely shown me that it was not a true friendship but an alcoholic friendship!

What’s everyone’s experience with friends and their sobriety?