Shifting those 4pm greeblies n a handy book....

[Simply me]

Heylo folks,

7 months down the track and the learning curve continues....

I had a rather clarifying dialogue with one of the counselors online here a couple of days ago and wanted to share some of the conversation, in case it's of use to someone else. We were talking about the fact that there's underlying emotional, and physical, challenges to cravings. Yep, get that. I am dealing with my 'stuff' I thought, I consult with a psychologist, I have some insight n do the work, however I realized that some of the 'conditioning' or 'sub-concious' beliefs I still held about not boozing were very much alive and well....

That sensation there's pleasure and a sense of relaxation being sacrificed. That though I'm fighting the good fight, it is a 'battle' to abstain. This is the conditioning I've received since I was a kid. If that model works for you, awesome, but it's been wearing a lil thin for me. I want to in-joy my life, despite the odd n shifting times we live in. So am trying to reprogram this approach. I realize life's not all roses n butterflies, believe me, but I don't want every afternoon / evening to be a grit my teeth so I don't pick up type experience. Honestly that's not quality of life.

I've just started reading a book that was recommended to me by that counselor n wanted to pass it on. I hope that's cool, cos it has so far proved useful at starting to debunk some of exactly these kinds of myths n beliefs, or at least examining them and having a ponder. It's called 'This Naked Mind' by Annie Grace, and you can get in Kindle format for a reasonable amount o dosh.

I'll also just share the current experiment for my 4pm greeblies. When asked what gives you that sense of calm, centred, relaxation? I replied, time spent in / with nature (it could well be something completely different for u). So, with the times we live in, many, including me, are reconnecting to our gardens. Be that window boxes, indoor plants or raised garden beds. For me, its herbs n veggies. I've got a stash of seedlings at various stages, and late arvo/ evenings are the perfect time for watering them (now drought has passed in our region). So, ass on step or seat and hose spray gazed at inanely like a fountain. By this time of day I've been working on distraction a whiles n energy levels are low. The point is to 'be' rather than 'do'. Hang with green folks n allow their vibes to flow in. Yield, allow soft gaze to shift about, listen to surrounding sounds, scents....try to be nourished by the process. I find memories popping in of other pleasant nature experiences, all good. Its early days, but here's hoping this wee meditative ritual will help chase em greeblies away.....sorry wrong address. I'm not the sort of folk who can simply 'sit' and meditate, but a gentle process like this mayhaps....

Thanks...

[Gizelle]

Hey there. The underlying unmet needs usually based in childhood experiences has been a trigger my whole life for turning to alcohol to keep me numb in the here and now so I don't feel bogged down in my pain. The trouble is my liver suffers and I get nothing done. I try and nurture this vulnerable part of me all the time and it's worth it. Since joining this online counselling only 9 days ago, I've been able to put a structure in place to turn to instead of turning to alcohol. I'm reading, gardening, looking at online study options etc. I feel sooo good right now... Hopefully as pain arises I can continue on this better path. Love being in the here and now instead of a blob on the couch watching tv I hardly remember.
Enjoy your garden! Gardens are wonderful healers for the soul. Even a few house plants bring joy!

[Lady Bug]

Hi [mention]Gizelle[/mention]

That is so wonderful to hear you are doing so well. You may find you learn a whole lot about yourself that you didn't know going through this experience.
Take care

[Gizelle]

Thank you Lady Bug

[Simply me]

Heylo Gizelle, Ladybug,

Gizelle, sounds like you're making that daily call to feel, be here n finding some nourishing experiences to do so with. Which is awesome! Including opening up here in the forums, and allowing folks like Ladybug to give a shout out, n encouraging my ramblings! Finding the things which are trails of interest n passion seems crucial to me on this voyage. Dig your list, curious about what u want to study....

I love to learn. In the now I'm playing with language n how I can use it to re-frame my experiences and thus where I'm heading, a stretch at times, but a worthwhile one I feel. Was actually writing up a list of what I want to 'bring in' then decided to take a break n drop by...

It's night raining as I type, and the skywater is cozy making. Also I know the greenlings will be getting a treat outside. The stash of ol seeds I found n sprinkled about like a mad Faery may just get that zap to germinate, like us....

Growing or cocreating a garden, is filled with such stories eh. Each morning I amble round the raised beds n see who's popped on a new set of leaves, emerged, or simply hung in, I may be feeling similar. Today I saw a baby praying mantis, a garden guardian, no chemicals required. It makes me smile to see these processes. When I was watering yesterday I looked at the passionfruit vine, with mercurial droplets suspended and had an aha beauty moment, past 4pm. Irreplaceable...

Blessings n good vibes....

[Gizelle]

Hello
Gardens are a treat! They need constant nurturing just like us humans do. When I feel hopeless and heavily drink I guess I reflect a garden that needs watering and weeding. I'm allowing my organs to get pushed around by weeds that want to literally destroy my liver, my brain, my kidneys.... I can't stop drinking until my inner nurturing gardener takes stock and weeds, waters and feeds my organs which are a symbol of plants that have been left to fend for themselves.
What a joy it is to put in place a structure to make sure my garden flourishes!!
I owe it to my organs that constantly work to try n keep me in tip top condition to nurture them so that me, the structure that holds my liver, my brain, my kidneys, my heart, my lungs, my everything; my holistic self can flourish.
Good luck everyone over Easter break. Drink lots of water for your organs. We're all worthy of being there for ourselves and each other.

[Djarrimiri]

Hiya Gizelle - curious about the reference to structure. It's a topic I'm looking at.
I loathe structure/religion/prescriptions for living, mostly cuz it has never worked for me the way we were told it would. Upon reflection, those are all just empty promises anyway and yet I'm gobsmacked at when structures do seem to work for people. Do they cave and conform, or do they settle for something, or do they check their brains at the door?

But especially with COVID19, it seems to me a structure might help me. So what took you there, and how much do you feel comfortable discussing?

[camembert]

Hey [mention]Djarrimiri[/mention]
How are you going with everything?
COVID-19 definitely changed things up for us this year.... did having structure help you get through it all?
Or did you prefer a different approach?
I'd love to hear what works for you - new ideas are always awesome for our members to read about!
Take care, camember